I am so tired of school. So very, very tired.
I just don't understand. I really want to like school. I've tried to make it interesting, but it just isn't. I don't like it. I don't get fulfillment out of it. I need to do something with my hands.
I need to live.
But I don't feel like I'm living when I'm sitting at this computer trying to figure out how to like something that I really don't. And I need to feel like I'm alive. Because if I don't, life seems pretty pointless. Like right now.
I even went out and cleaned out the chicken coop today. Not because I really wanted to. But it was more fulfilling than school.
I only want to understand how to like school. How to embrace it. Because trust me, I will. Show me that answer to making Earth Science and Mind and Body Stewardship fulfilling, and I'll do it all day.
I just don't feel like I'm doing what God wants me to do while I'm sitting here basically doing nothing. And while the fact that I'm sitting here doing nothing is not the schoolwork's fault, I just can't find it in me to go do the school work. It's that depressing to me. And schoolwork isn't a bad thing. I just don't think it's the best thing I could be doing. I don't see how forcing myself to learn things that will never apply to my life are going to bring me joy.
I dunno. Really this is a pointless post. You may stop reading now if you wish. Just remember that your friend Dallin could use advise if you have any regarding making school fulfilling. :-P
Just go do something awesome today and come back and tell me about it, okay?
Thank you. :)
You mentioned that you don't think you are doing what God wants you to do. Have you really thought about that? D&C 130:19 "And if a person gains more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his diligence and obedience than another, he will have so much the advantage in the world to come."
ReplyDeleteWhat we learn is all we take with us. I sit in front of a computer doing stupid stuff all day too. I would much rather be out in the sun with the kids playing, on the four wheeler, but I can't because I'm doing what God wants me to do. Support my family. I often don't get to do the things I think are fun and that make sense. I have to do things that don't make sense, and that aren't fun. I still enjoy my job though. I have fun with it, and enjoy the people I work with.
You are learning the things of life. We often have to learn the things we don't think are necessary to learn the things that are.
"You don't develop courage by being happy in your everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity."
ReplyDeleteEpicurus