I think every person on earth has that one (at least one) human being to whom they are very emotionally attached, who lives very far away. That person who they wish lived next door, or even that they wish was their sibling so they could be with them all the time. Some of us have more than one person like that. Some of us have many. And no matter how many people you feel this way about, it's hard (trust me: I've fallen into all three categories). Sometimes it leaves you feeling emotionally worn, exhausted, and beaten. Sometimes it leaves you feeling emotionally broken, torn, or shredded. The hole in your life where they should be can stab or it can ache; but however it hurts, hurt it always does. We attempt to allay the pain by writing letters, sending emails, talking on the phone, chatting, skyping, and everything else, but nothing really kills that persistent pain except actually being together.
Why the pain? Isn't it absurd? Why can't we either let go of our longings to be with that person (or those persons), or else quiet our fussy heart by reassuring it that we'll see them again sometime? I've tried both these strategies, and both offer only temporary respite. They last only as long as I can deceive myself into thinking that I don't miss them.
Well, after struggling for many years, I have finally reached this conclusion: we are not meant to get rid of those feelings. Those feelings aren't pointless pain, they are evidence of something more profound. There is supposed to be pain when we are away from those we love, because we are not beings of this world. If we were, we would adapt to the point where we could kill these feelings; but no. We are heavenly beings on a mortal adventure. Ultimately, we are meant to be with those we love forever. No goodbyes. No endings. And no unbearable distance. It will be perfect.
The pain really isn't fun at all. But we push through it, work through it, and try to be grateful for it, because it's another reminder of Heaven, and what is to come.
***
Bio thing:
Catherine is fairly certain that she was born with a pen in her hand (although her mom denies it). Writing is a little bit of an addiction for her, and she does it as much as possible. (To read more of her writing, you can visit her blog here!) She also enjoys studying, being quirky, and being in the company of her cool friends, among other things. She currently resides in a lovely corner of Pennsylvania with her amazing parents and awesome little brothers. She is super honored to have had this chance to write for Dallin's blog, and hopes what she said made a difference. :)
It defiantly made a difference in CaRynn's life! Me lufs you Chip! Keep up the good work!
ReplyDelete